on seasons, getting older, and new acquisitions

spring, like autumn, is liminal. it is neither warm nor cool, and yet sometimes both. betwixt and between: like yoruba adolescents engaged in initiation rites- they are neither child nor adult, neither alive nor dead. the spring is an awakening and the autumn a slow death. i have never understood those who say, "i love the fall!" as i cannot find the same emotion to describe the falling away of light and life. summer and winter are definite- concrete in their opposition. there are those whom we so affectionately call "snow bunnies", and yet we all gravitate toward heat like moths to a flame- basking in the snug cocoon of blankets, fire, and sunlight. air conditioning (that devil's creation) is a curse designed to freeze away the blessing of summer: hot, wet, sexy heat. i long for july and august afternoons- lazing about with sticky thighs and flushed cheeks, sweaty knees and dirty toes.

i miss the summer whenever it's not summer. i hate fall almost as much as i hate winter because it is a constant premonition of fearful, dreadful events: snow. i never thought much of spring, except that spring always comes before summer and that, of course, makes me happy. this spring i have become acutely aware of what the season is all about: pollination. i have never experienced allergies of any sort, aside from a mild reaction to our furry feline friends (which i have ignored for my entire life). for the last week i've been an ear/nose/throat doctor's dream- a congested, sniffley, sneezy, mess. friends have offered kind advice on medicines and homeopathic remedies but not much has worked to alleviate the symptoms. i'd like to go back to when i thought people were whiney babies for complaining about their allergies. i don't like feeling their pain. but that's what happens when you get older. and no, i'm not saying i'm old by any stretch- just getting older. it happens and things change, i just didn't realize they'd change so fast. so it goes, i guess.

so that leads me here. inspired by the recent onset of seasonal nasal allergies, here is a list of my most recent acquisitions:

an acute dislike for cucumbers and/or anything cucumber scented.
constant neck pain- on the left side only.
the complete inability to wake up earlier than 7:30am or later than 9:00am.
back fat (eww, but seriously...)
financial responsibility!
debt (seems you can't manage one without the other).
an indescribable fear of driving on 84 west at night and/or during traffic.
gray hair. ok, more gray hair.
bad hearing and even worse vision.
sun spots (we'll call 'em freckles cuz' that sounds cuter).
a lust for older, balding men.
and finally, more understanding, patience, and respect-
for myself.